[mitchntx]

Last July, I lost my brother and 4 months later my step father passed away.

My mom, had to be moved into a nursing facility 6 months ago because of her alzheimer's disease.

She still recognizes me, but it's a battle each time I visit her. She thinks she is living in a pick up truck, in a grocery store parking lot and begs me to take her home.

It broke my heart to commit her to a nursing facility even though I know she is getting a lot better care than I could ever give her.

It's worse seeing her deteriorate at an alarming pace. Each visit, her mental condition is significantly worse

Talking with her psychiatrist tells me to visit as often as I want, but that she will become more and more agitated and upset when I do. According to her local case worker, she does just fine in her daily routine. But when me or my wife visits, she is a handful for a while, many times requiring sedation.

I'm torn between my obligation to care for her and see after her and letting her go. She's not the same person. It's the same soul, but not the same person.

Thanks for letting me rant ...

[Rob Hood]

Dang Mitch...sorry for the struggle. Stay with your Mom as much as you can. The right people (including God) will know of your efforts.

I had to deal with the loss of my grandmother (dad's mom) and my mother-in-law, both happening while I was deployed and unable to return home in time for either funeral. My grandmother had Alzheimers and Osteoperosis, and she could barely recognize anyone except my Dad towards the end. Since she was the only grandparent I really knew it was a pretty tough loss all around. My wife really struggled with running the house while I was gone and going to visit her Mom in either the hospital or her home nearly every day for about 3 months until she died.

Like others have said, remember the good times, and make sure they get passed along. That's what truly makes someone memorable.

Rob