[mitchntx]

Last July, I lost my brother and 4 months later my step father passed away.

My mom, had to be moved into a nursing facility 6 months ago because of her alzheimer's disease.

She still recognizes me, but it's a battle each time I visit her. She thinks she is living in a pick up truck, in a grocery store parking lot and begs me to take her home.

It broke my heart to commit her to a nursing facility even though I know she is getting a lot better care than I could ever give her.

It's worse seeing her deteriorate at an alarming pace. Each visit, her mental condition is significantly worse

Talking with her psychiatrist tells me to visit as often as I want, but that she will become more and more agitated and upset when I do. According to her local case worker, she does just fine in her daily routine. But when me or my wife visits, she is a handful for a while, many times requiring sedation.

I'm torn between my obligation to care for her and see after her and letting her go. She's not the same person. It's the same soul, but not the same person.

Thanks for letting me rant ...

[AllZWay]

Hang in there Mitch. We just lost my Grandmother a couple months ago after only a couple of years of pretty bad Alzheimers, so I sort of understand your struggle, but not as close to home.

I personally could not go and see her often and I explained it to my Mom that I had already considered her gone. That person was not my Grandma.

Keep your chin up and remember the good times.