[mitchntx]

Last July, I lost my brother and 4 months later my step father passed away.

My mom, had to be moved into a nursing facility 6 months ago because of her alzheimer's disease.

She still recognizes me, but it's a battle each time I visit her. She thinks she is living in a pick up truck, in a grocery store parking lot and begs me to take her home.

It broke my heart to commit her to a nursing facility even though I know she is getting a lot better care than I could ever give her.

It's worse seeing her deteriorate at an alarming pace. Each visit, her mental condition is significantly worse

Talking with her psychiatrist tells me to visit as often as I want, but that she will become more and more agitated and upset when I do. According to her local case worker, she does just fine in her daily routine. But when me or my wife visits, she is a handful for a while, many times requiring sedation.

I'm torn between my obligation to care for her and see after her and letting her go. She's not the same person. It's the same soul, but not the same person.

Thanks for letting me rant ...

[mitchntx]

Teddy ... you always seem to pop in at the most oppurtune time. Thanks for those words.

Jeff, you have no idea what a comfort you have been this year. I cannot express in words the heartfelt "thank you" I feel for you and Bev.

Dennis ... OMG!

What can I say but thank you so much for sharing that with me and those that might read this. Those are truly words of comfort and uplifted my spirit. You have penned exactly what my head has been saying and my heart has been trying to ignore. After I posted this, I thought what a stupid, pitiful thing to post. I'm glad I didn't now.

While cancer is a terrible, terrible disease, this is one is just as cruel, if not more so.